twinkie defense for subway gropers

I came upon bizarre news story today, regarding the disturbingly frequent incidents of molestation on crowded subway cars.  When an article is titled "It's candy or bust for stressed-out 'gropaholics'" (I think that's supposed to be a pun), and begins with this sentence:

Summer, when women wear skimpier clothes and expose more flesh, traditionally sparks a jump in cases of train groping

. . .this is usually a good time to stop reading.  And yet I keep going. I must hate myself very, very much.  The following passages appear towards the end of the article:

While the average salaryman may see a woman's bust and be impressed, he'll generally turn away. Yet some men simply can't resist the temptation and thrust their hands out to cop a feel.

"When men are aroused by some sort of external influence, such as aroma, the dorsal lateral nucleus and preoptic area of the brain's instinct-controlling hypothalamic region become aroused and make the body act. Normally, this is what stirs the groins of men who see a beautiful woman," Yamamoto says. (blah...blah...blah) There's a high likelihood that habitual gropers may have something wrong with the way the prefrontal part of their brains are working."

Food culture researcher Hisao Nagayama says that chewing gum and candy could be a way for chronic gropers to combat their molesting malady.

"Excess stress causes a decrease in glucose, the brain's only source of energy, which in turn brings about a decreased ability to control impulses. Sucking on glucose-filled candy might be a good idea," the food expert tells Shukan Post. "Chewing stimulates the cerebral cortex, which raises consciousness, and could perhaps stop the impulsive grab, so gum may be a good choice, too."

Ok ok, but hasn't anyone ever told Dr. Expert that Sexual Abuse is more about power than it is about sex??? Me, I learned that in freshman sex-ed class back in the 90's.

In light of this new "scientific discovery," I half expect the Tokyo Metro authorities (the same people who founded the ineffective and shortsighted "women-only" subway cars) to start passing out twinkies on subway platforms during rush hour.

They could call the campain Bonbons for Bumgrabbers, Gumdrops for Gropaholics, or Candy for the should-be-Castrated!!  (And in Japanese, there's always okashi for the okashii.)

Before they all start mobilizing the twinkies, though, they may want to also question their policy of decorating every other train car with advertisements that consist of soft core porn.

But that's just my opinion.

Comments

[THW]

Wow, Japan is so odd. I had no idea.

If I ever travel to Japan in the summertime with my wife, I'm investing in a taser. Not going to feel sorry at all for the Salaryman that gropes my wife.

[Auberginefleur]

I find the advertisements for the girlie magazines highly offensive and think the train companies should be sued for sexual harrassment.

AF

ps. I also thought I was a fool for reading that same article all the way through to the end.

[Scout]

I would've stopped reading. I get way too pissed off.

[H. Craig Bradley]

In close quarters and when dealing with the public, you have to put up with a lot of people who smell, have bad breath, or are otherwise disagreeable. However, there are some appropriate maneuvers you may take to protect yourself.
Last summer, I was attending a movie at a nearby United Artists Theater (Regal Cinemas) and was “groped” on the head by an old geezer trying to find a seat after the movie had started. Here is a technique which worked for me:

Grip the suspect firmly, but gently, by the fingertips of the offending hand and move it laterally away and to the side of you. At the same time, give a verbal command not to touch my head (in this case). If the individual is smart, that is the end of it. If, on the other hand (no pun intended), there is any argument, just raise the fingertips upward until the “offender” feels some pain.

Repeat as necessary. Now, if there is any effort to force the matter, who is in control? Incidentally, a petit woman or short guy could affect the same deterrent on a larger person using the fingertip hold just described. It is quite effective. The more force the other person exhibits, the more force you are legally empowered to deliver in return.The object is to make the offender cease and desist, not necessarily say “uncle”. Let the police do the rest if they are around at the time (usually they are not).

Women need to learn how to physically get the upper hand and sense when a given tactic is practical and when it isn’t. I am not sure anything is practical when you are sardined into one another in a crowed train or subway. To a certain extent, you take your chances anytime you go out “on the street”.

[White Chikan]

I'm a Chikan and I love be a in that way. Why you don't write about the Chijos and the thousands of girls around the world who loves be touch it?
Be Chikan its great!

[Dutchie]

I would carry a cattle prodder - it's his stick or mine, isn't it ?