You Rememory Me?

A good part of this weekend was spent answering some questions for the media, about my experiences as a bar hostess in Japan.  Most questions were the same as the last time I was interviewed, some six months ago.  Yet I worry that, as I describe the hostess bar scene in Tokyo as I remember it, my answers lack a certain consistency.

More to the point, I feel like my attitude towards my past is changing so rapidly that I'm not sure how I should describe how I felt in those bars anymore. I'm not sure which few sentences would best describe a few years of total chaos.

And on top of all that, I have to constantly remind myself to keep my memories tightly in line with how I described the hostessing world in my book. 

After all, everyone is obsessed with "the truth," in memoir writing these days.  When I was writing my book, I was often told that my story had to be accurate enough so that no one would ever accuse of lying, yet distorted enough to mask the identity of anyone and everyone involved (especially those who could potentially sue me for slander)...whatever "truth" that amounts to.

Yet memories, I think, are just as much about present feelings as they are about past events.  So my perception of the past is changing, because my present is changing, and that's the truest thing I can tell you right now.   

Comments

[Ashi]

Well, I really hope that you feel your present is changing for the better. After I read through all your posts since the beginning (I couldnt sleep that night!), it was quite easy to see that your outlook on life is much more positive, but then again this is just a blog and I can't tell personally.

By the way, thanks so~ much for adding me to your "Live from Japan" list.

[VicariousRising]

Really great observations about yourself and how far you've come.